Useful Tips

Eight Ways to Be More Convincing


The order of the arguments affects persuasiveness. The following scheme is recommended: strong - medium - one the strongest.

Weak arguments are not part of this scheme. If you have identified a weak argument - do not voice it, as it can harm. After all, the interlocutor is looking for weaknesses in our argumentation. Do not give him a single chance.

To get a positive answer to a question that is important to you, first ask your interlocutor two simple questions to which he will answer yes.

Why does this work? It is established that the word "yes" contributes to the release of endorphins (hormones of pleasure). Having received two servings of “pleasure”, the person relaxes and is positively attuned. Now it’s psychologically easier for him to say yes.

Status affects credibility

The higher the status of a person, the higher the weight of his arguments. We implement this rule when we ask a respected person to “put in a word for us” or quote a respected person. The same rule is implemented in commercials: medications are advertised by doctors, pet products and food - by veterinarians or breeders, washing powders - by housewives.

Respect the interlocutor, do not belittle its significance

Your interlocutor should be the main one! When we show disrespect for the interlocutor, we belittle his status, we cause only a negative reaction and create a bad impression about ourselves. Give your interlocutor the opportunity to feel like an important person!

We are more loyal to the arguments of a pleasant interlocutor and critical to the arguments of someone who is not pleasant to us

A pleasant conversationalist and pleasant one, which gives pleasure and unwillingness to enter into confrontation. A pleasant impression is created by the appearance, respect for the interlocutor, competent speech, etc.

Dance from the point of contact

If you want to convince the interlocutor of something, first give the arguments with which you both agree, and only then the arguments on which there are disagreements.

Empathy is our hobby

Empathy - the ability to feel the state of the interlocutor. Adjust to the interlocutor. For example, if your interlocutor is very nervous, show that the situation excites you as much.

Avoid words, actions that can provoke a conflict. No offensive words, gestures, views, ambiguities.

Use gestures and facial expressions to maintain conversation and empathy

If you radiate joy and goodwill, then your charm will be difficult to resist. however, be careful - a person should not perceive your smile as a grin, and a benevolent attitude - as a mockery.

We meet the needs of the interlocutor

Your task is to prove to the interlocutor that what you are proposing can satisfy some of his needs (remember the Maslow pyramid). It is much easier to find an argument if you know what kind of human need you can satisfy.

Focus on their values

Our values ​​are what ultimately govern our behavior. Therefore, it is much easier to convince a person, concentrating on his values ​​than on his own.

When persuading you need to start from the perspective of your interlocutor, not yours. Persuasion is a kind of walk with the interlocutor from point A (where he is) to point B (where you want him to be). Many people understand this, but still persistently continue to start a conversation with their own desires. Then just a little patience is needed.

Where to begin? Start by listening to the person you are talking to. Listen to his opinion, thoughts, beliefs. But in no case do not be hypocritical. You can focus on the values ​​of the interlocutor, but should not convince him that you share them, if this is not so.

Speak their language

Pay attention to the words and phrases that your interlocutor uses, especially if he often repeats them.

If they do not fit your character at all, then it’s best not to use them. But in most cases it is quite simple. This approach works well, because it will allow you to convey the thought to the interlocutor with the help of his picture of the world.

If the interlocutor uses words that are incomprehensible to you, be sure to find out their meanings. So it will be much easier to find a common language and convince him. This method is even better than talking to a person in his language, because it allows the interlocutor to feel significant.

Call them by name

We could not but include this well-known method in the list, because it really works perfectly. People are obsessed with themselves and do not even hide it, so those who manage to show a little respect, who show that they are communicating with you, will get a lot.

Do you want to pay special attention to your words? Say his name and he will automatically start listening and listening. Simple, ingenious and effective.

If you are not familiar, then the interlocutor automatically has a feeling of close acquaintance, which can help arrange him and convince.

Use facts and statistics

The more facts you have, the better. In the next paragraph, we will talk about the fact that this is not enough, but still the number of facts matters.

People are more likely to trust research, statistics, and dry numbers. Yes, they alone may not be enough, and yet, if there are facts, you can count on victory.

A person who rolls in a variety of numbers seems more authoritative and knowledgeable. Moreover, in the information age, you can find a sea of ​​information on almost any topic. But it's worth checking them out.

Remember that arguments are real facts, not what you think is a fact. It’s better to do without it if you’re not sure.

Create emotions

Dry facts never work on their own. Even with smart people, it’s not enough to push only logic, evidence, and numbers.

Emotions should not interfere with your message, but complement it. Ask yourself: “What emotions should I evoke to convince this person?”.

Then think of ways:

  • Tell a personal story about you or someone close to you.
  • Ask someone to tell you a personal story about themselves.
  • Create a hypothetical scenario ("What happens if I ...")
  • Use metaphors
  • Use music or video

Facts allow a person to think, and emotions - to act.

Be consistent and honest.

In any persuasion, trust is not an empty phrase. This is one of the most valuable relationships that can arise between people. If they trust you, they are ready to follow you, ready to forgive you, even if you fail.

Consistency is important to create the feeling that you understand the topic. Chaotic thoughts lead to the opposite result.

If you were caught on inconsistencies, immediately apologize and do not insist that there was nothing.

Use social evidence

Social proof - This is a psychological phenomenon that occurs when some people cannot determine their preferred behavior in difficult situations. Then they pay attention to what most people choose.

The most curious thing is that people are extremely rare and reluctant to admit that they made a choice based on social evidence. They will justify their action by anything, but not by the fact that they were influenced by the majority opinion.